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Anyone got a dog themed joke?

Discussion in 'General Dog Forum' started by Sezzy, Jan 24, 2018.

  1. Sezzy

    Sezzy Well-Known Member Registered

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    What do you call a dog magician?
    .....a Labracadabra :oops:
     
  2. Violet Turner

    Violet Turner Well-Known Member Registered

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    What did the hungry Dalmatian say when he had some kibble?
    ...That hit the spot!
    :)
     
  3. Josie

    Josie Administrator Administrator Registered

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    :D:D:D
     
  4. Sezzy

    Sezzy Well-Known Member Registered

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  5. Josie

    Josie Administrator Administrator Registered

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    Just what was needed on a Friday! Thank you @Sezzy
     
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  6. Josie

    Josie Administrator Administrator Registered

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    What do you get if you cross a sheepdog with a jelly?


    The collie wobbles!
     
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  7. Violet Turner

    Violet Turner Well-Known Member Registered

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    :p:D
     
  8. Sezzy

    Sezzy Well-Known Member Registered

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    Why are dogs bad dancers?
    Because they’ve got two left feet :D
     
  9. Violet Turner

    Violet Turner Well-Known Member Registered

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    :p:D
     
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  10. Sezzy

    Sezzy Well-Known Member Registered

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    Did you hear about the dog that gave birth on the street?
    She was fined for littering ;)
     
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  11. Violet Turner

    Violet Turner Well-Known Member Registered

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    that's good
     
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  12. Sezzy

    Sezzy Well-Known Member Registered

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    What goes tick, tick, woof?

    A watchdog :D:D:D:D
     
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  13. JudyN

    JudyN Well-Known Member Registered

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    Dog: My humans feed me and care for me and cuddle me. They must be gods.

    Cat: My humans feed me and care for me and cuddle me. I must be a god.
     
  14. Flobo

    Flobo Well-Known Member Registered Partner

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    What do you get if you cross a dog with a vegetable?...A Jack Brussel
    A dog has an owner. A cat has staff
    What dog wears contact lenses?...A cock-eyed spaniel
    ( I'll stop now!!)
     
  15. Sezzy

    Sezzy Well-Known Member Registered

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    A3923F4B-691F-4382-9D6D-F8966D14B927.jpeg
     
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  16. leashedForLife

    leashedForLife Well-Known Member Registered

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    .

    After a talking sheepdog gets all the sheep into the pen, she reports to the farmer: "All 40 accounted for."
    "But I only have 36 sheep!" says the farmer. "I know." says the sheepdog. "I rounded them up."


    - from Norie Bloom of 
Honolulu, Hawaii

    .
     
  17. leashedForLife

    leashedForLife Well-Known Member Registered

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    "I spend three minutes every 
day, choosing a TV channel 
to leave on for my dog while I'm gone.
    Then 
I go to work, and people take me seriously as an adult."

    - Damien Fahey
    .
     
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  18. PupsterPassion

    PupsterPassion New Member Registered

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    This is my fave :)
     
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  19. leashedForLife

    leashedForLife Well-Known Member Registered

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    "I’m a dog trainer. Before meeting a new client, I asked her to fill-out a questionnaire.
    One question asked, 'Why did you choose this breed?'
    My client responded, 'I often ask myself this very question.'

    - trainer Cindy Mauro of West Milford, New Jersey

    .
     
  20. leashedForLife

    leashedForLife Well-Known Member Registered

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    "I dressed my dog up as a cat for Hallowe'en.
    Now, he won't come when I call him."
    :(

    - Reid Faylor
     
    Sezzy likes this.

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