Difficult/sensitive decision

[Bellac]

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We have the most wonderful little dog and we love him endlessly so please no judgement.

Due to the cost of living crisis and finding myself a single parent I've had to take more hours at work which means I'm out of the house a lot. We have a dog walker who comes and takes our boy out for half day walks whilst I'm in work. However I've had to reduce the number of days because of the cost.
I feel super guilty leaving him at home so long by himself, even though I take him for a quick morning walk and walk after work I feel like he deserves more. I've sat crying at night over the guilt and wondering if it would be better for him if we found him a new family who had more time for him.
Obviously this is not what I want but I just can't help but feel awful everyday I head off to work and leave him behind knowing he will be home for a long time alone. I've even considered maybe getting another dog so he has company through the day.
This isn't the circumstances we got him in, just unfortunate life has taken this turn.
If anyone can offer some advice, words of wisdom, anything I would be extremely grateful

 

[JoanneF]

Nobody's financial situation is completely predictable so no judgement here.

On the one hand, dogs live in the moment so if he went to another family, it's likely he would settle. But please, if you take that route, be very very careful, a lot of people adopt dogs for less than noble reasons.

On the other hand, I'm sure there are other options. For example, have you heard of Borrow My Doggy? It's a scheme for people who for various reasons can't have their own dog but will take other people's dogs for walks or to their home for a few hours for companionship. That sort of thing could be perfect for you.

And it's possible your financial situation will recover at least to some degree. Some more information might help - how old is he, how old are your children - if he is an older dog, he might be quite content to sleep more in the day, school holidays are coming up so maybe your kids could step up.

I wouldn't suggest another dog. Dogs don't always see another dog as good company and if they didn't get on you'd have even more problems. Plus, you would then have the cost of having a second dog too.

 

[JudyN]

Welcome to the forum - you will get no judgement here. It is clear that you have your dog's best interests at heart, and won't be making any decisions lightly.

I agree with JoanneF that getting another dog wouldn't be a good idea. Can I ask what breed of dog he is, and what age? Do you get the impression that he struggles with being left - does he go frantic when you get home, for instance?

 

[Bellac]

He's only 4 years old so still quote young and playful. Hes a jack russel too so they have bags of energy! My children are not quite at the age they can take him for walks on their own yet and I'm working all over summer holidays.
He does go frantic when we get home and same when I get his lead ready for walks so i feel he is desperate to go out. Weekends are a little easier obviously I'm home and he comes to the beach, days out ect with us.
It's just the amount of time he spends alone at home I don't think it's fair to anyone and that's where the guilt comes in.
I will definitely look at borrow my doggy site, thank you for the recommendation!
I wi

 

[Tinytom]

Whereabouts are you .....
Your boy is still getting 2 walks a day and is indoors in a safe home where he is loved so although it may not be ideal that he is left such long hours at least he has a great home ....do you leave the radio on for him ...have you got friends/family that maybe able to pop in to let him out ...is there anyway he can access the garden safely whilst you are out ....
There are always options so dont panic ....just by you asking for help shows how much you love your boy

 

[Hemlock]

I agree that a second dog is not a good plan.

I also think that it can be a minefield sorting out a new home, because there are lovely people and there are far-from-lovely people, so it would take a lot of investigation rehoming him to strangers. The undesirable people can often talk a good case. Then you see your dog up for sale, or someone gives them cash for him at the pub.

Tinytom's take on this is mine exactly - two walks a day are good, and a happy home is clearly what he has now. Terriers are always full-on - ours would give us the 21-gun salute even if we'd only been out for half an hour!

Lots of people work full-time and do their best for their dogs - it happened to me when I came off shift work and my dog had to fit in with office hours. As long as the remaining hours at home are dog-centric, they manage every bit as well as dogs where the owners are at home, and far better than those many dogs where the owners may be physically present but the dog is shut in the kitchen or in a kennel (indoor or outdoor) or being hassled because the owners don't understand dogs.

Quality time is what it's about. In my opinion, your dog is already in his best home.

 

[arealhuman]

I agree with everything that's been said so far, so will try not to revisit it. I love the comment from @Hemlock about getting a 21-gun salute!

I completely understand the situation you're in - the pandemic and cost of living crisis hasn't been kind to me although I appreciate others have it a lot worse.

Your dog does indeed sound like he's in a loving home, that's a fantastic place to start. One thought - more and more work places are becoming dog friendly. Is yours? Obviously the environment would need to be suitable, but it could be an option (I also understand it can be difficult to ask for this type of support, too). I assume you've already considered friends/family who might be able to help.

Have a look at the website @JoanneF mentioned and let us know what you find. I have no knowledge of it, and I'm sure you don't need me to say check out who he goes out with!

Don't fret (easy to say, harder to do, I know), I'm sure there's a solution here.

 

[JudyN]

There's no need to answer this, and certainly no need to go into details, but assuming your ex still cares about the dog's welfare, would they be prepared to stump up money to cover a dog walker? I'm guessing you will have already considered this if it is a possibility though...

 

[Bellac]

Thank you to each and every one of you who's commented. I have freted over this situation for so long and was so nervous to post for fear of being judged. All your comments have been so lovely, kind and helpful.
I think I need to look at the fact he is a very happy doggo and we love him endlessly.
Hopefully the cost of living crisis will ease itself in the near future so we can resume extra walks with our dog walker.
In the mean time I have checked out borrow my dog website and just keep giving him all the love and fuss when we are at home.
Thank you all again so much. What a lovely group, I'm so glad I came across

 

[arealhuman]

I think I need to look at the fact he is a very happy doggo and we love him endlessly.

This. I think if you rehome him, you'll both be distraught. Keep posting back with updates please, we'll do all we can to help remotely.

 

[arealhuman]

Hi @Bellac - how are things going?