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There is a new line of Barbie dolls just been released.
1. Dog Groomer Barbie - This Barbie is always brushing, trimming, clipping
and bathing. Her only draw back is that she is constantly wet and covered
with hair. Comes with clippers, grooming table, comb, brushes, grooming
smock, lint brush and Band-Aids. This Barbie is so busy, her canine clients
often look better than she does.
2. Dog Handler Barbie - She comes with a moveable arm which can be snapped
into place for perfect show handling. No way to lose with this Barbie beauty
showing your mutt. She will do anything to win. She has been known to sleep
with judges. This Barbie includes the book, "How to Suck Up and Win", along
with many pocketed outfits for showing. Motor home not included.
3. Dog Handler Assistant Barbie - She's a handler wannabe who loves abuse.
She is covered with hair, chalk and grooming spray. She comes with her
pockets stuffed with assorted leashes, collars, combs, squeaker toys, and
brushes. She is often seen with a variety of spray bottles hanging from her
belt. She always smells of liver and has dark circles under her eyes. She
has permanent leash marks on her hands from dogs whose owners insisted they
were trained. She comes with all of the above plus a stress management
video.
4. Dog Show Judge Barbie - This Barbie is looking for the right dog. After
many years of picking "losers" for men, Judge Barbie is content finding
"winners" in the dog ring. She comes with clipboard, granny glasses, frumpy
dress, the AKC guidelines on the perfect dog, a white glove to detect
foreign substances, sensible shoes and a current rabies shot.
5. Dog Show Chairman Barbie - A blunder on our part, this Barbie comes
complete with a case of Lady Clairol, a prescription for Prozac and an
unlisted phone number.
6. Ring Steward Barbie - This Barbie is shy and reserved. She wears Nike
running shoes for those quick trips to the potty due to lack of relief
stewards. She comes with a map of the show site, so she can find her way
back to the ring, crying towel for those inconsolable losers, rubberbands,
armbands and a megaphone for the hard of hearing. She also has a monogrammed
folding chair for her use only.
7. Junior Handler Barbie - She is always a winner in her own mind. She comes
complete with a short skirt, a ponytail, and a bad attitude. Unfortunately
her life span is very short.
8. Pooper-scooper Barbie - This Barbie has no sense of smell (for obvious
reasons) and is a glutten for punishment. She comes with a pooper scooper,
muck boots, an orange vest, a lighted miner's helmet for those evening
pickups, a sack of shavings, bleach, a mop and a bucket. She is often found
surrounded by flies and "cleanup" is her middle name. She has a Certified
Sanitation Engineer Degree through her local Community College.
9. Dog Show Vendor Barbie - This Barbie is not cheap and neither is her
merchandise. She comes complete with a vending tent and sunscreen. She also
has a variety of dog related items. If this Barbie doesn't have it, they
don't make it.
10. Dog Show Photographer Barbie - This Barbie is truly a sight to behold.
Her photographer's vest is loaded with no less than fifty rolls of assorted
film and a multitude of squeaker toys to get your dog's attention. She never
takes a bad photo and will refuse to shoot ugly dogs. If you mention her
name in your ad, she will give you extra 8 x 10's for free!
11. Whelping Barbie - This Barbie completes our line of Dog Show Barbies.
She goes anywhere help is needed. She births babies at a moments notice.
Comes with van, cell phone, dental floss, scissors, towels, goat's milk,
forceps, coffee, and a pillow for those endless nights.
1. Dog Groomer Barbie - This Barbie is always brushing, trimming, clipping
and bathing. Her only draw back is that she is constantly wet and covered
with hair. Comes with clippers, grooming table, comb, brushes, grooming
smock, lint brush and Band-Aids. This Barbie is so busy, her canine clients
often look better than she does.
2. Dog Handler Barbie - She comes with a moveable arm which can be snapped
into place for perfect show handling. No way to lose with this Barbie beauty
showing your mutt. She will do anything to win. She has been known to sleep
with judges. This Barbie includes the book, "How to Suck Up and Win", along
with many pocketed outfits for showing. Motor home not included.
3. Dog Handler Assistant Barbie - She's a handler wannabe who loves abuse.
She is covered with hair, chalk and grooming spray. She comes with her
pockets stuffed with assorted leashes, collars, combs, squeaker toys, and
brushes. She is often seen with a variety of spray bottles hanging from her
belt. She always smells of liver and has dark circles under her eyes. She
has permanent leash marks on her hands from dogs whose owners insisted they
were trained. She comes with all of the above plus a stress management
video.
4. Dog Show Judge Barbie - This Barbie is looking for the right dog. After
many years of picking "losers" for men, Judge Barbie is content finding
"winners" in the dog ring. She comes with clipboard, granny glasses, frumpy
dress, the AKC guidelines on the perfect dog, a white glove to detect
foreign substances, sensible shoes and a current rabies shot.
5. Dog Show Chairman Barbie - A blunder on our part, this Barbie comes
complete with a case of Lady Clairol, a prescription for Prozac and an
unlisted phone number.
6. Ring Steward Barbie - This Barbie is shy and reserved. She wears Nike
running shoes for those quick trips to the potty due to lack of relief
stewards. She comes with a map of the show site, so she can find her way
back to the ring, crying towel for those inconsolable losers, rubberbands,
armbands and a megaphone for the hard of hearing. She also has a monogrammed
folding chair for her use only.
7. Junior Handler Barbie - She is always a winner in her own mind. She comes
complete with a short skirt, a ponytail, and a bad attitude. Unfortunately
her life span is very short.
8. Pooper-scooper Barbie - This Barbie has no sense of smell (for obvious
reasons) and is a glutten for punishment. She comes with a pooper scooper,
muck boots, an orange vest, a lighted miner's helmet for those evening
pickups, a sack of shavings, bleach, a mop and a bucket. She is often found
surrounded by flies and "cleanup" is her middle name. She has a Certified
Sanitation Engineer Degree through her local Community College.
9. Dog Show Vendor Barbie - This Barbie is not cheap and neither is her
merchandise. She comes complete with a vending tent and sunscreen. She also
has a variety of dog related items. If this Barbie doesn't have it, they
don't make it.
10. Dog Show Photographer Barbie - This Barbie is truly a sight to behold.
Her photographer's vest is loaded with no less than fifty rolls of assorted
film and a multitude of squeaker toys to get your dog's attention. She never
takes a bad photo and will refuse to shoot ugly dogs. If you mention her
name in your ad, she will give you extra 8 x 10's for free!
11. Whelping Barbie - This Barbie completes our line of Dog Show Barbies.
She goes anywhere help is needed. She births babies at a moments notice.
Comes with van, cell phone, dental floss, scissors, towels, goat's milk,
forceps, coffee, and a pillow for those endless nights.