My little shadow - Dog Following Me Everywhere

[kerry_harry]

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Hi All,

Am new to this forum. I have just rehomed a lovely little jack x pom called Harry from a family home who couldn't keep as they were going to work full time (I work from home so not a problem for me)

Now, I have only had him for 3 days so am aware he is still in his settling in period....everywhere I go, he follows, if I'm out of his eyesight for even a split second he cries. He won't eat/drink from his bowl unless I am stood right next to it and even then he just grazes he seems so worried that I'm about to run off and leave him. I made a mistake the first night and gave in to his crying when he was 'meant' to be sleeping downstairs and I let him up into my bed! The second night I realised my mistake and he slept on the floor in my bedroom no crying and was good as gold. Same again last night. If I nip upstairs to the toilet he follows and cries outside the door, he's reluctant to go out in the garden to toilet unless I go with him (which isnt always practical I have a young son)

Now my question is, is this just a normal 'settling in period' behaviour and is there anything I can do to make him more secure? I've only left him for about an hour since I've had him I heard him crying as I left but when I came back I listened at the door and heard nothing, wasn't until I put the key in the door he barked (normal for him)

Am I giving in too easily? Bit of background, I am his third owner (he's only 2) so I understand his anxiety I just want to make him as comfortable/happy as possible but want him to be an independent dog and want him to interact with other people as he will only go anywhere with me.

Kerry

x

(sorry for the long winded story)

 

[banana]

Poor ruffer - he is worried you are going to leave him I imagine...

I would keep reassuring him and try and maybe do something next to him while he eats, like make a cup of tea or start dinner so you aren't 'just' pandering but showing him you are there...

I am sure that with time he will become more reassured....

Piccie please!

 

[hanneroon]

hiya, it does sound as tho he is worried and just settling in, mine is prone to this type of thing(i'm his 5th owner), he comes to work with me and if we go somewhere new it starts again till he's sure i'm not going to leave him there.

He will get used to things and will understand where you are in the house etc, when he's got used to all the noises. The best thing you can do (steel yourself this is going to be hard) is to ignore him when he cries, if he is outside the bathroom crying, just open the door, and brush past him like you haven't noticed him, no eye contact no sounds, no patting, and carry on with what you are doing. If you reassure him when he is worrying over something trivial like a closed door he will think there was something to worry about. That said, he is still settling in, so as banana says lots of reassurance and love is needed the rest of the time. I don't think you did the wrong thing by bringing him upstairs, he must have been in a state and he needs to know you'll look after him too! If you find him chilling out on his own, make sure to give him a good fuss then, by going over to him...

Same goes if you have to leave him, no fuss or saying bye, or even thinking guilty thoughts, he will be fine and safe and he does need to be able to have time on his own, the only way you will acheive this is by doing it, often for short periods, then building up. Getting him dead tired first will help too.

I used to feel very sorry for my dog when he followed me to the loo, i also just want him to be independant. People would say i should be flattered and he obviously 'loved' me. But i wanted him to be comfortable on his own for 5 mins as that is a normal happy dog!

If i have to leave him somewhere odd, like popping out for someone when i'm at work and i leave him, he will often cry, i say to the person i'm leaving him with, if he cries, tell him off, some people do, some people just can't do it (sweet little old ladies aren't that good at telling off a crying whippet). He just goes back to bed when told off, but will stand and cry if reassured.

i'm sure your little doggy will start to settle, its still early days yet, and he may still be thinking he's just about to be taken back to his old home, good luck, and some photos please!

 

[Oreo]

Regarding the food I would start to gradually move awy from the bowl with every meal.

So start by standing a few steps away while he eats, do that for a few days then stand away further.

Eventually he'll get used to it.

Maybe also you could try hiding little treats or bits of kibble around the house (maybe just in the room your in at first) just so he gets used to eating away from you.

 

[Dizzyjenni]

Awww what a little sweetheart!!!

Could you start building up the time you can leave? 5 mins, come back and give fuss, 10 mins, come back and give fuss etc ?

 

[kerry_harry]

Ok well after reading the replies, today I tried the method of when I went to the loo, bedroom etc and came out I ignored him, seems to be working if I leave him for a short while but progress is progress!!!

Regards the food, I stood next to his bowl but didn't coax him into it, just ignored it, made tea, pottered about the kitchen and today he has had his first full bowl of food and plenty of water! Im absolutely thrilled! and to top off a great day he is now snoring in another room whilst Im enjoying some me time!

Thank you all so much for your advice and I will keep it up!

xxxx

And here is Harry, hope its worked xxxx

 

[lurcherman]

you got to be calm as you can, its strange for him,my lurcher rio was rescue and he didnt want any affection for 3 months, hes now nearly 11 and hes a big softee who loves fuss, on the food issue it will settle down in time, with exersize comes hunger. hope all goes well.

 

[kerry_harry]

I am noticing that, I've also found out today they only fed him their leftovers, so I suppose he isnt used to being fed 'dog food' in his bowl. But I've got a lot of patience and I'm determined to make this little man comfy in his long term home. just hard not to be over loving and let him think he is the boss xxx

 

[lurcherman]

keep us updated please kerry.