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Please help!

Discussion in 'Puppy Forum' started by jambeck123, Dec 1, 2014.

  1. jambeck123

    jambeck123 New Member Registered

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    Unhappy Please help, new puppy!!

    I am one very confused and upset new time dog owner to a Labrador X 14 week old puppy. We have 3 young children (10,6 &3) who have always been a bit jumpy round dogs and so didn't force dogs on them. We talked at some length about getting a puppy of our own that we could train and incorporate into our busy family. I was looking one day and found Rocky, local to us and at 10 weeks old in need of a home as owners circumstances changed and they could no longer look after him. I am home at the moment but do plan on going back to work next year so thought I could be around. Also, Rocky's birth date is the same as my eldest daughter so was immediately suckered in!!

    I talked it over with my family and we met Rocky, a lovely little black pup. Yes, we will take him!! Collect on Monday by Wednesday doubts began to trickle in. My children were a bit nervous around him as he jumped up and playfully nipped and even though a pup quite big against my 3 year old! I played with him and thought he was great despite the nipping, pooing and weeing, which was cracked quite quickly. However, the tables have now turned, the children and husband are bonding but unfortunately the initial desire for Rocky has worn off for me and now I'm left in a terrible dilemma! It is very stressful in my house with three boisterous, lively children all demanding my attention as they do and I'm afraid that Rocky may have been the straw that broke the camel's (or my) back I have become extremely emotional, feelings of complete despair and isolation at the prospect of having another body being dependent on me. Life was good before and I had things sorted, time to myself and then I got Rocky. Never having had a dog before ever it has proven to be one of the most testing times of my life and unfortunately has triggered a state of depression where I'm constantly crying and wanting to turn back the clock. I'm now under the doctor and on antidepressants. Rocky is a good boy, learning everyday,behaving well and attending puppy school, it's just me! I'm on the verge of a nervous breakdown but wish no harm to the dog. I want him to be loved and part of a loving family which is why I'm finding the decision of whether to keep him or rehome him. I knew it would be hard, especially with a puppy, friends with dogs have been very sympathetic, but if I'd of known how hard and how I would be feeling now I probably would not have got him. The sad thing is we have only had him for 3 weeks but they have been the worst of my life. As I'm at home I would be the primary carer. If anyone can offer advice it would be really and truly appreciated, thank you.
     
  2. poppy2714

    poppy2714 New Member Registered

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    I know this feeling all to well myself, as prepared as I thought I was poppy has been a handful and I have been considering taking her back to the breeder as my partner and myself live apart she is my soul responibilty during the week and I am finding it very tiring and I dont have three children to contend with. Is there anything in your past that could be making you feel like this? As I think mine is due to some family background. You are doing incredibly well at keeping it together and getting the support you need but you need to be honest with yourself as to if you should keep him, if it is going to affect your mental health. Maybe talk to your husband see if he can support you more. Everyone keeps telling me it gets easier as they get older, you need some more support is there anyone at puppy classes who could help you? I wish I could help more but I am trying to take it day by day
     
  3. Nikita Jane

    Nikita Jane New Member Registered

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    Think a lot of owners will relate to this - particularly in the first few months and especially a first time owner! It is such a difficult decision and you obviously had and still have the best intentions. I suppose you have to try and see a situation where all parties can be happy - whether that means keeping the dog and looking back on this as a difficult period as he sounds like he would make an excellent addition! or you put it down to experience, find him a nice home and feel positive that you'd be giving him the best chance at a happy life and maybe you can look into getting a dog when the time is right (having learnt what they entail!)

    I'd hate for you to feel disheartened either way so it must be your choice (as you say you are the primary carer an know your limits - its nothing to be ashamed of!)

    All the best
     
  4. Hagrid

    Hagrid New Member Registered

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    I hope that you made the right decision for all of you, puppy's are incredibly hard work especially when you have lots of other things on your plate as well!

    Fingers crossed things have settled down for you now?
     

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