Separation anxiety - advice

[fluff82]

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Hi All,

Hoping you can help, my pup is 13 weeks old now and even from day 1 struggles to be alone.

He now sleeps in his own bed in the bedroom as we weren't getting any sleep at night as he just howled and barked constantly, he now sleeps through without any accidents.

His toilet training, socialisation and learning commands is all progressing well and he's a loving friendly and happy animal, when he is with us.

However, he can't bear to be separated at all. The kitchen is closed off with a stairgate (we thought he would handle that better) and even if it is closed and we are on the other side of it he starts to whimper, this then turns into howling and barking.

We have to go out sometimes and currently leave him no longer than 2 hours at a time but it's hit or miss what we will come home to.

Sometimes he seems to settle and other times we come home and he has wet his bed, and there is poo all over the floor where he's done it and then run through it, jumped up at cupboards/doors and generally made a mess.

It's getting to the point where I don't want to leave the house because it takes 20-30 mins to clear up/mop the floor etc. He also sometimes howls/barks (not sure for how long before he gives up) and the neighbours sometimes hear him and we don't want him to be a nuisance.

I work from home so he's not alone very often which I think may be making it worse as some days he doesn't get left alone at all.

The vet has suggested a behaviourist which feels extreme when he's still a puppy?

We have tried the radio on, leaving a kong, leaving all of his toys, taking him for a walk first and there doesn't seem to be anything that consistently helps.

Does anyone have any other tips we could try?

Thanks

 

[HappyPawsBedford]

Hi have you tried crate training him? Luna is very similar. If we leave her alone for any time at all, and she's not in her crate, she is very upset and won't settle at all. But if we leave her in her crate she soon settles down and goes to sleep. As long as you introduce them to the crate slowly and make sure only lovely things happen in their crate (we fed Luna all her meals in there with the door open for a few months) then it becomes their little safety place and they feel happy and secure there.

I would do some research into the benefit of crates and how to crate train your dog. It will take time cos it's not something you want to rush but should help loads in the long run. Luna sleeps in hers every night and happily takes herself off into her crate if she's tired or just wants some quiet time. It's her little bedroom and she feels safe there. It's made it a lot easier taking her to stay and people's houses or on holiday as well, as we can take her bedroom with us. So that way she has somewhere that's familiar and smells like home with her so it makes the whole thing much less stressful for her.

You should also make sure as you leave it's very quick and unemotional to show the dog 'it's no big deal' if you're upset or feel guilty for leaving them on their own you will be subconsciously telling them that you leaving is bad and upsetting.

I hope this helps, and you get things sorted soon.

 

[gypsysmum]

Crate training is great. it will not help in the short term as your puppy seems to be over bonded to you. This can happen when people are available to the puppy all the time.

A behaviourist would be a fantastic investment for the future. Your puppy is not too young. Take a look at COAPE or the APBC to find properly qualified people. Anyone can call themselves a behaviourist so you need to go to the right source.

One thing that might help, in the meantime, is to be very cool for at least twenty minutes before you leave your puppy. If they have had lots of attention from you and then you go out it makes a huge impact. Someone who has walked around the house as though they don't have a dog will not be missed nearly so much when they leave as someone who has been fussing and playing with their puppy.

 

[PuppyJackRussell]

Have you had any luck since?

 

[Shewbert]

He's young yet, you are able to cure a lot of this yourself without expensive and specialist training.

If you are going out or returning home, don't make a big fuss of the dog, just go, no fuss no treats, make it just a normal part of daily routine.

He has his bed in your room, ok if you want him sleeping in your room fine, if not youve already done it, so over the course of time, slowly move his bed closer and closer to the door until it is outside, let him sleep outside the door for a bit then move his bed downstairs,, take his bed downstairs when its not bedtime.

Puppies are masters at getting their own way, they will bark whine cry constantly scratch at the door etc to get your attention, it's hard but don't give in to this behaviour, when he susses out that it's not working he will eventually stop.

He has to learn the NO BAD DOG command (different from just saying no)

Say very sternly NO BAD DOG then instantly turn your back and walk away, do not speak make eye contact, totally ignore him for a few minutes,,,, call him over after a few minutes get him to sit and treat him for sitting.

Done a few times your dog will hate this command, he will think you do not like him you will not speak to him, it is effective.

Do not use this for every misdemenour he does as this will have an adverse effect, he will in effect think that you really do not like him, so just for major misdemenours.

I wouldn't worry too much about him, 13 weeks he is still a baby, he will have to learn all about his new home, family etc and you will have to learn about your new family member.

I hope this helps you a bit, please keep us all informed on how you get on.

Shewy