The Most Dog Friendly Community Online
Join and Discover the Best Things to do with your Dog

Welcome to Our Community
Wanting to join the rest of our members? Feel free to sign up today.

Tesco Murder !!

Discussion in 'General Discussions and Lounge' started by hely, Apr 27, 2009.

  1. hely

    hely Active Member Registered

    Messages:
    19,256
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    36
    So, here's the story. . ..

    Tired of constantly being broke & stuck in an unhappy marriage, a young husband decided to solve both problems by taking out a large insurance policy on his wife with himself as the beneficiary, and then arranging to have her killed.

    A 'friend of a friend' put him in touch with a nefarious dark-side underworld figure who went by the name of 'Artie.'

    Artie then explained to the husband that his going price for snuffing out a spouse was £5,000..

    The husband said he was willing to pay that amount, but that he wouldn't have any cash on hand until he could collect his wife's insurance money.

    Artie insisted on being paid at least something up front, so the man opened his wallet, displaying the single £1 Coin that rested inside. Artie sighed, rolled his eyes, & reluctantly agreed to accept the £1 as down payment for the dirty deed.

    A few days later, Artie followed the man's wife to the local Tesco Super Store. There, he surprised her in the produce department & proceeded to strangle her with his gloved hands & as the poor unsuspecting woman drew her last breath & slumped to the floor........

    The manager of the produce department stumbled unexpectedly onto the murder scene. Unwilling to leave any living witnesses behind, ol' Artie had no choice but to strangle the produce manager as well.

    However, unknown to Artie, the entire proceedings were captured by the hidden security cameras & observed by the store's security guard, who immediately called the police. Artie was caught & arrested before he could even leave the store.

    Under intense questioning at the police station, Artie revealed the whole sordid plan, including his unusual financial arrangements with the hapless husband who was also quickly arrested.

    The next day in the newspaper, the headline declared ...

    (You're going to hate me for this ....

    'ARTIE CHOKES 2 for £1.00 AT TESCO!'
     
  2. Whippets4eva

    Whippets4eva Active Member Registered

    Messages:
    4,503
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    36
    (w00t) (w00t) Thats quite good for you hely :- :p

    :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
     
  3. Painted Lady

    Painted Lady tattoo luvver Registered

    Messages:
    22,874
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    [​IMG]
     
  4. jinnyfizz

    jinnyfizz Coataholic Registered

    Messages:
    9,455
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    I like that!!!! :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
     
  5. trac

    trac A pet is for life Registered

    Messages:
    24,177
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    36
    [​IMG]
     
  6. STORM CHASER

    STORM CHASER New Member Registered

    Messages:
    264
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    :lol: :D :lol: :D
     
  7. Schmick

    Schmick Graeme Registered

    Messages:
    1,534
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    :lol: :lol: :lol:
     
  8. Tiggs

    Tiggs New Member Registered

    Messages:
    145
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Made me laugh! :lol:
     
  9. meddling

    meddling 'Dibs' Registered

    Messages:
    20,706
    Likes Received:
    9
    Trophy Points:
    38
    -_- :wacko:
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.