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[SIZE=14pt]In front of construction works at Bolivian airport: Sorry for the bother[/SIZE]

 

Above basin in toilet on train, China: Don’t throw things in the pond

 

Sign on windy road in the Himalayas: Be mild on my curves

 

Small hotel, Cornwall: Will any guest wishing to take a bath please make arrangements to have one with Mrs Harvey

 

Munich, Germany: In your room you will find a minibar which is filled with alcoholics

 

At a wadi in Oman: Drowning accidents are now popular

 

Czech Republic: We like 2 please our customers but if u r unhappy please see the manager who will give u total satisfaction

 

In Japanese national park containing monkeys: You had better deposit your baggage into the charge free lockers or it will be ours. But we are not interested in your camera. We do not like to be stared at our eyes. If you do so, we are not responsible for what will happen. We do not hope to be such a monkey. Please, refrain from feeding us

 

Toledo, Spain: Frozen ice available here

 

Dydo coffee, Japan: There’s a gallon of deliciousness in every drop

 

Notice on a door in Sana’a, Yemen: Physio the rapist

 

Sign outside cottage hospital, Caribbean: Dont (sic) park here, hearse calls daily

 

Illustration from Charlie Croker's Still lost in Translation

 

“Emergency exit” sign at Beijing Airport: Do no use in peacetime

 

On snack handed out on China Southern Airways: Airline Pulp

 

In Japanese car park: Please get a punch at window No 2

 

Restaurant, France: Fish soup with rust and croutons

 

Restaurant, France: A confection of plugs and geysers

 

Restaurant, Switzerland: Half a lawyer with prawns

 

Restaurant, Yaroslav, Russia: Lorry driver soup

 

Restaurant, Kos: Kiss Lorraine

 

Restaurant, China: Dumpling stuffed with the ovary and digestive glands of a crab

 

Hotel in Canary Islands: Great entertainment – live paella

 

Hotel, Lake Garda, Italy, offering early evening aperitifs: Martini & nipples On website of a French hotel, restaurant specialities include: The Salmon Smoked House; The Ham of Stage coach House; The Sausage of Ass House; Spotted frog thighs; The flap with shallot; The nice one of pig green pepper

 

Sign next to Shanghai swimming pool: Bottom of pond very hard and not far from top of water

 

Budapest: Forbidden to hang out of hotel window. Person which do so will be charge for clean up mess on footpath

 

Guide to Buenos Aires: Several of the local beaches are very copular in the summer

 

Sign on Spanish beach: Beach of irregular bottoms

 

Sign in Japanese park: Keep Japan green don’t burn the fire chief

 

Sign at the Ethnic Minorities Park, Beijing: Racist Park

 

Tourism brochure trying to say “Jerusalem – there’s no city like it!”: Jerusalem – there’s no such city!

 

Japanese sign: Don’t protrude the tartness and keenness out the staircase

 

Sign for disabled toilet, China: Deformed man toilet

 

On an oil tanker in India: Edible. Oil tanker!

 

Road sign, New Mexico: Gusty winds may exist

 

Sign in Prague hotel: Water is officially drinkable (but not for sucklings), but we don’t recommend to drink it

 

Hotel brochure, Copenhagen: In fire, the bells rings three times. There is a fine escape on each floor. For other amusements see page 3
 

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