HELP & ADVICE PLEASE

[SazzyJ2]

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I adopted a lhaso 4 weeks ago, she has settled OK, but I need advice so much.
She is 2, came from a home who had a toddler, another dog, owner pregnant and she couldn't cope so dog was crated all the time.
She told me she wasn't house trained and that's why she was kept in crate. That was it.
We took her, she is lovely but scared of everything
We have a crate but she sleeps in a dog bed in our room.
Crate training isn't the worry.
She won't walk and scared of her harness but slowly getting out of the house with cheese, we get about 4 houses along before she wants to go home.
She barks and growls at visitors but won't hide in her bed, or go to the quiet corner we set up downstairs just barks and won't stop.
She is house trained and loves our garden but that's all.
She follows me everywhere which isn't ideal. Also whines if I go to the loo outside the door. I haven't been out without my husband staying at home since I have had her, hubby wanted us to go out a few days ago but couldn't as didn't want her whining. She looks very sad, and has started carrying her toy around everywhere and licking it, she doesn't play with the other toys we got her , licky mat, 2 puzzle toys and balls.
I want to help her but don't know where to start. I'm not very experienced only ever had one oldie rescue.
I feel like I've made a mistake and want to address it, rehoming isn't an option.
Any advice welcome
I have started doing the fliting game, how many sessions per day do I do this?
Thanks for reading

 

[JoanneF]

Can I start by saying it's really, really early days. Also, it doesn't sound like she has had a lot of attention in her previous home. I think it's going to take a bit of time.

Regarding the Flitting Game, I'd do it three or four times a day, with maybe half a dozen flits in each time.

For walking, it might help if you don't try to think of it as 'going for a walk'. If you can change your mindset and look at it as a training game rather than a walk, you will take some pressure off yourself. If you get four houses along and she wants to come home, just do that. That will show her that you are listening to her, and when she learns you aren't going to force her to face things she isn't ready for, she will start building more confidence.

Barking at visitors - we would normally suggest you put her in another room, but if she is anxious when she is alone that might not be a good approach. I know this is not what you want to hear, but would it be possible to avoid visitors until she is more settled and can be in a different room? Then you could progress that to having her behind a baby gate, and work up to being in the room. Maybe others will have more ideas.

A final point - if she is carrying a toy around, is there any chance she might be having a phantom pregnancy? That would impact on her being unsettled and clingy too.

 

[JudyN]

Well done for taking her on. I agree with JoanneF - it sounds like she hasn't had a great life up to now, and it will take time for her to move on from that trauma. How long, it's not possible to say, but you need to do it at her pace rather than try to push her out of her comfort zone before she's ready.

If she is happy to go outside the house, could you arrange to meet a friend outside the house and get her used to that person there? Then, when she's warmed to them, they could maybe come into the house with you and if that's OK, later they could come round and visit. Again, be led by how she feels about this. When going for your 'walk', you could also give her a treat whenever someone else comes nearish - but don't let anyone get close enough to make her uncomfortable, even if this means moving away or being rather abrupt with that person.

If the doorbell is a trigger, then you, or a family member, could stand outside the door and ring the bell, and every time it rings give her a treat (in her 'safe place'). You want to do this until the doorbell ringing gets a happy response from her, and ideally she will go straight to her safe space when it rings.

For separation anxiety, have a read here: Separation anxiety

And do please let us know how you get on

 

[SazzyJ2]

Can I start by saying it's really, really early days. Also, it doesn't sound like she has had a lot of attention in her previous home. I think it's going to take a bit of time.

Regarding the Flitting Game, I'd do it three or four times a day, with maybe half a dozen flits in each time.

For walking, it might help if you don't try to think of it as 'going for a walk'. If you can change your mindset and look at it as a training game rather than a walk, you will take some pressure off yourself. If you get four houses along and she wants to come home, just do that. That will show her that you are listening to her, and when she learns you aren't going to force her to face things she isn't ready for, she will start building more confidence.

Barking at visitors - we would normally suggest you put her in another room, but if she is anxious when she is alone that might not be a good approach. I know this is not what you want to hear, but would it be possible to avoid visitors until she is more settled and can be in a different room? Then you could progress that to having her behind a baby gate, and work up to being in the room. Maybe others will have more ideas.

A final point - if she is carrying a toy around, is there any chance she might be having a phantom pregnancy? That would impact on her being unsettled and clingy too.

Thank you for your reply
I think you are right, I'm taking it slowly and in my head I think it should be going faster, re walks.
She has abandoned the toy in her bed and is happy today playing with her puzzle toy.
We don't have many visitors, just 2 Adult kids and 2 older grandkids who she likes, it's the adults she isn't keen on. Any parcelman or neighbour who knocks she does the constant barking, it's like 10 mins.
I have a list of tips to try but as she has a lot of issues it's knowing when to do training for them. Do I do all of them or just work on her not following me for now.
I can see her personality in there but it's giving her confidence is another thing.
I will just keep at it.
She is being netured in November, vet thinks it might help xx

 

[JoanneF]

Can you get people to text you rather than ring the doorbell?

Personally I'd not worry about training too many things right now. Let her find her feet without the pressure of trying to learn new things too. I don't know if you learned about Maslow's hierarchy of needs in school but it basically says creatures (dogs, humans, whatever) can't focus on higher level thinking like learning until their basic safety and comfort needs have been met. For example, you wouldn't be able to do long division if you thought your house was on fire. To be fair, I can't do long division anyway but I'm sure you get the picture ...

Anyway, I'd just focus on the Flitting Game for now.

 

[Flobo]

Well done for committing to this little one. I haven't got any other training tips but patience and understanding, which you sound like you have, are important. Building her confidence will take time, sometimes a very long time...but you have already made progress, she is now going out with you even if it is only 4 doors down, remember progress IS progress. As said above, follow her lead, if she wants to go home, take her home. It sounds like she's had very little input in her last home, dog's are not meant to live in a crate! Hence her fear/anxiety of all things new she is now experiencing, all the things that are just normal every day goings on to us are scary to her.
It has been suggested before, by JoanneF I think, to keep a diary of any progress she makes, no matter how small, then when you feel like things are not getting better you can look back and see how far you both have actually come.
4 weeks is no time at all when the 2 years she's been alive have probably been pretty rubbish for her

 

[RGC]

Congrats and big praise for adopting the waif. All of our dogs (whippets) are rescued - two have gone to the pet shop in the sky and our current adoptee came with the mother of all emotional angst. That was almost four years ago. As others have said, it was trust and confidence which had to be addressed. We put no pressure on Mabel, everything was at her pace. She’s come round and is a very happy hound but she still has odd panic reactions as if something in her past life gets triggered so don’t expect complete success in too short a time. You’ll be surprised at how much progress you’ll make. Best of luck and enjoy her.

 

[Feverfew]

Some fantastic advice here, which I won't add to, but just to say I think this little dog may have landed on her paws with you as her new family - best of luck with her. It will take a bit of time, but it sounds to me as if you are more or less on the right track

 

[Cath S]

I am no expert but with regards to her following you - I would just let her. We got my dog in July 21 when he was 11 weeks old. It has taken til now to be able to leave him for a couple of hours. I just let him follow me around the flat and now it is at a stage where he is bored following me and rarely does. Separation anxiety is very complex and people kept telling me that you cannot resolve it whilst they are suffering from it. Sounds like she needs time and patience in her new loving home. Cx