My dog has died

[bluediamond]

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I'm so sad. I'm confused, heartbroken and so upset. Just before Christmas I was unable to get delivery of the main regular food I feed both of my dogs (raw tripe). They have both eaten this for the last 6yrs no problems. Anyway to get us thru the holiday period I got them a bag of dry food after searching for one with no chemicals etc. Both seemed to enjoy the change and as I expected both started drinking a lot more water. However the spaniel had a couple of accidents in the house, i changed him onto butchers tripe and he seemed to settle down again. I never thought anymore of it then their regular food arrived just after Christmas and I transferred both back onto that. Just this Monday the spaniel didn't want to eat and I noticed he had a blocked crusty nose so I cleared it for him then he started drinking a lot again but wouldn't eat. We had a restless night Monday and he was also sick and his eyes looked all droopy and bloodshot and I noticed a little blood coming from his nose he really looked ill so I called the vet out of hours early morning and took him in to the surgery. The vet seemed surprised he could walk I guess me calling him in out of hours he was expected a dog incapable of that, anyway I explained the food situation and the drinking etc said I was worried it may be his kidneys and the food change was just purely coincidental with the increased thirst. He looked him over said he was feeling groggy and under the weather got a blocked nose and a stuffy head and gave him an injection of Loxicom and a few pills for me to administer during the next few days then bring him back in for a check up. The vet said once we had cleared up this episode we would do blood tests to see if he did have kidney trouble. I asked the vet did he think this was an emergency situation he said no, I apologised for getting him out of bed. But I know my dog and up until he stopped eating he had been his normal self. This was my first visit to this vet as I am new to the area. Tuesday I couldn't get him to take any of the pills as he wasn't eating and he looked really poorly. I managed to get one of the smaller pills into him but after drinking he was sick and it came back up. I had to work and by late afternoon when I finished work and checked on him he seemed to be getting worse, eyes looked awful and he had a yellowy discharge from them now too, I rang the vet again and said I was worried couldn't get the pills into my boy explained he hadn't eaten now for 48hrs and was being sick. Vet said to bring him in first thing in the morning. During the night my dog woke me a couple of times and the last time he woke me around 4am he was actually stood up and wagged his tail a little, I thought he was rallying round at this point, I went outside with him and he had a wee then followed me back inside lay down and went to sleep. I was wide awake now so decided to stay awake. He slept till about 7.30am then got up went into the kitchen for a drink where he lay by his water bowl and seemed to be really struggling to take a drink. I jumped in shower to get ready to go to the vets. When I came down my dog had been sick in the kitchen and it looked quite thick and tarry with blood in it. I put him in the car, he was sick twice on the way to the vets. The vet looked at him said he was going to keep him in as he really was quite a sick boy and also dehydrated, they put him on a drip and I was going in later in the afternoon to visit. Vet said that the urgency was to do tests now to see what was going on and was glad I had rang and took him back in. I got the feeling the vet was kind of saying I should of listened to you more when you called me out for emergency appt. When I went to visit my boy he stood up in the cage when he heard my voice which I took as a good sign but then was immediately sick again with blood. He had also had diarrhoea I was told by the nurse. My boys stomach looked swollen and bloated even tho he had eaten nothing, his eyes had gone from being bloodshot to being all yellowed. Vet said could be liver/kidney/both or something else going on and we would know when test results back in and at the moment he was a very ill dog. I got a phone call this morning, my boy past away in the night. I went to see him and he looked peaceful and was no longer bloated. Vet said he had cancelled blood tests to save me money and said he could do post mortem to find out why he died but thought it was unfair on the poor chap and his thoughts were cancer spreading rapidly that's why it was showing in his head, and it could of been in his liver, kidney, pancreas etc. I wasn't really thinking straight was so upset and all such a shock. I'm so confused I had stated I was worried about kidney disease. In short my dog, who would of been nine in a couple of weeks, rapidly deteriorated to his death in such a short time. I know liver and kidney diseases don't show signs until late stage but such a quick end to a wonderful life has left me heartbroken and confused. I feel like I let him down. Sorry such a long post.

 

[chelynnah]

I honestly don't think it was to do with the food - it wouldn't happen that quickly, and particularly if your other dog is ok. However both last year and this there have been dogs dying of renal failure after coming into contact with something uknown in the New Forest and other areas. I'm not sure where you are, but it would definitely be worth looking into. Here are a couple of links

http://www.newforest.gov.uk/index.cfm?articleid=14110

http://www.andersonmoores.com/vet/news

Having said that, when you stated about the blocked nose and blood coming from his nose, my first thought was cancer.

Either way, you have absolutely NOTHING to blame yourself for. I know it will hurt that you were not there with him at the end, and that will take some time to get over, but you did everything you possibly could, and he loved you. He was feeling so unwell, but he got up and wagged when you came to see him because he loved you and he knew you loved him. If you have the opportunity (and funds) to change your mind about the blood tests or the pm, and you really want to know to ease your mind then go ahead and do it. But looking at his symptoms and progression and having sadly seen other friends go through these type of symptoms with their dogs, I strongly believe it was a cancer. Often-times not seen till it's too late, but not much you could have done ahead of time.

I really do feel for you. But try and remember the great life he had, make a memorial, share pictures and stories. Celebrate his life.

Wendy

 

[lurcherman]

Poor you... Poor dog... R.i.p..its natural to blame yourself but dont it happens so quickly at times..

 

[goldenbear2013]

This has made me cry! How awful and so so sad

my thoughts are with you at this horrible time!

May your wonderful dog rest in peace

xxx

 

[jayelew]

I am so sad to read this. It is so similar to the way we lost our lovely GSD girl a few months ago. I know it is human nature to blame yourself. Even now I keep wondering if I could have taken any further steps to save her. I think it will always be at the back of my mind. She had a malignant liver tumour. It erupted and bled into her adbominal cavity.

We were actually with her in the vets surgery when it happened.

Please don't blame yourself. You did all you could for your boy One day, when the hurt eases a bit, you will be able to look at his photos and remember the happy times you had with him. I haven't reached that stage myself yet, but I am sure I will, one day. I have two pups who are a delight to own. I love them dearly and will always do my best for them; but I would have given everything I own if I could have saved my lovely girl. She is still the last thing I think of at night, and the first in the morning.

 

[bluediamond]

Thank you so much for your kind words and thoughts. Today I am collecting my precious boy from the vets and taking him to the pet crematorium, I had made the arrangements with the vet but he wouldn't be collected until next weds and I wasn't thinking straight at the time it all happened so quickly. I feel that this last journey should be made together and then I can bring him back home today. x

 

[JenShea]

im so heart broken for you-i hope everything went as well as it could today, x.

 

[Badlydrawnmum]

I am so sad having read your story about what has happened to your beloved boy. I hope you've been able to grieve him more clearly now and look at all you did for him. Sometimes when we are worried about someone we love, we have to rely on the advice of professional helpers. You trusted the advice of your vet, I suspect feeling the vet would know best. We often look back after loss thinking it was my fault, or I wish I'd done..... and ultimately our decisions are dictated by our circumstances and you obviously did everything you could for your lovely animal companion. I agree with a person above who has said personal memory things help such as making a photo album, release a balloon, make a memory box. Something you can put your love for him into and treasure.

I think, right now you'll still be very upset and have the mix of feelings we have when we are suffering loss - that will be unique to you. I hope you are working through those feelings and that you have others close to you who are willing to listen and offer support. In my experience, the loss of an animal companion can be as painful as the loss of a loved person but often we are more limited in who we can share with, because not everyone gets it. If you still have lots of emotion that you wish to share there are a couple of supportive websites which are great that I've used, Living with pet bereavement and also the Ralphsite.

I feel your lovely dog was very lucky to have you and that you did everything you possibly could in his hour of need. x