Anyone got a dog themed joke?

[leashedForLife]

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"We’re eating 
dinner soon!... 
Don’t fill up 
on homework."
----------- Mom-dog, calling to her pups, playing


from Alex Baze

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[leashedForLife]

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"We’d been longing for the pitter-patter of little feet, so we bought a dog.
It's cheaper than having a baby, plus you get twice as many feet."


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[leashedForLife]

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"A woman called our airline, to ask if she could take her dog along. 'Sure', I said, 'just provide your own shipping-kennel.' I explained that crates had to be large enough for the dog to stand, sit, turn around, & roll onto their back.
The customer was flummoxed: 
'I’ll never be able to teach him all that, by tomorrow!'


--- from gcfl.net

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[JudyN]

A Doberman, a Poodle and a Sighthound died and are standing in front of God at the entrance to the kingdom of heaven ❤
God asks them all three, what they believe in?
The Doberman says: "I believe in discipline, training and loyalty to my owner."
"Good," says God, "take a seat on my right side."
"Poodle, what do you believe in?" Asked God.
The Poodle answers: "I believe in love and care from my owner as well as peace in the world."
"Ah," God said, "You can take a seat to my left side."
Then he looked at The Sighthound: "And what do you believe in?"
The Sighthound stood there, looked at him and answered :
"I believe you're sitting in my seat!"

 

[Jon Roff]

How did the little Scottish dog feel when he saw a monster? Terrier-fied

 

[Toffeedog]

A man walks into the vets with his cross eyed bulldog and says
‘ my dog is cross eyed, can you help him?’
The vet says ,
“Let’s have a look”
She picked up the dog and inspects him.
After five minutes, she says,
“I’m going to have to put him down”
“What!” Says the man , “ only because his eyes are crossed?”
“ No” says the vet, “ he’s really heavy”

 

[merlina]

A borzoi walks into a bar and orders a drink. The barman says, 'Why the long face?'