An Exhibitors Solution.......

[quintessence]

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Excuse me please but I don't think

I was the only one weighted down by drink

The judge you plainly just called she

Was in actual fact a flamboyant he

But I'm grateful for your on-going help and

would like to return the favours

So I'm sending you some vouchers,

redeemable at Specsavers.

I'm pretty sure he realised that Sparky was all male

I could see his eyes get wider as he fumbled near his tail

He cleared his throat and winced a bit and said "what age is he"

I fixed him with my 'special' look and said "38 Double D"

I've heard that there were mutterings this decision 'was not cricket'

Well I'm just disappointed that I didn't get The Ticket

But we're not in any trouble, despite what it might seem

I had a really good idea and now I've joined the Cream

I've just sent off my payment for 'The Accredited Breeder's Scheme'.

I would now like to invite you to come and join me when

we show off our new invention to those on Dragon's Den

The rules as I have read them say the panel must plainly see

how painless is the procedure to harvest whippet wee

we will need to attach the little pipe I've imported in from Phuket

so I'll grab hold of Sparky and you can hold the bucket.

 

[meddling]

Yey, great to see a new episode :cheers: - Thanks do much Jenny! :huggles: Brilliant, love it!!! :lol: :lol:

 

[maggie217]

:thumbsup: Thats great Jenny...over to you now Juley :teehee:

 

Pauline

 

[Juley]

[SIZE=14pt]I don't think that I really thought,[/SIZE]

I'd see you live on air,

But there you were, upon the screen,

Right in the dragon's lair.

 

They all seemed to be most impressed,

When told about the car.

200 miles per bucket of wee,

Or 20 miles per jar.

 

I think the problem started,

When the Dragons asked you, please

To give a demonstartion,

Of how you collect the wees.

 

The silence in the studio,

You could hear the drop of a pin.

When in walked Sparky on a lead,

With a hosepipe on his "thing".

 

Well the Dragons rocked with laughter,

Poor Sparky rocked with shame.

And the precious wee was wasted

As it trickled down the drain.

 

[neave]

(w00t) (w00t) (w00t) (w00t) (w00t)

 

[beaker]

:lol: :lol: keep em coming

 

[affieluver]

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

 

[maggie217]

(w00t) (w00t) (w00t)

Absolutely Fabulous

:teehee: :lol: :teehee:

 

Pauline

 

[marier05]

(w00t) :teehee: (w00t) :teehee: (w00t) :teehee: (w00t)

Very Good. :thumbsup:

 

[quintessence]

Our visit to The Dragon's Den was meant to be quite serious

I wouldn't say I was nervous, more bordering on delirious

I could sense the Dragon's interest as I began to speak

If only I had noticed that my bucket had a leak

The problem must have happened as we waited in the wings

Sparky has a habit of chewing plastic things

My demonstration went quite well then Sparky saw the money

He lunged towards The Dragons as though he's seen a bunny

He grabbed a bunch of fities, it really was a laugh

Sparky hadn't had such fun since The Puppy Stakes at Bath

Three times round the table went one whippet at the double

Sometimes you just know when you've landed in big trouble

If only the tall Dragon had stayed firmly in his seat

He wouldn't have landed in a heap at Deborah Meedon's feet

The cause of all the carnage was pretty clear to see

He'd gone a**e over elbow when he slipped on whippet wee

I had to act quite quickly as I tried to save the day

I apologised profusely and said that I would pay

for any damages incurred, I'd even clean the floor

the remaining Dragon's laughed and said

"Don't worry, say no more"

The Dragon's then composed themselves and said that they would make

An offer to invest a sum - for a twenty five per cent stake

We're going to have a collection point outside the NEC

I've negotiated some signage, well actually it was free

I've had to change the word a bit but I think you will agree

There's comfort in a yellow sign advertising

P e d i w e e

 

[neave]

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

 

[meddling]

Jenny - brilliant as always....so good to get another installment :lol: :lol: :lol:

 

[k4tie-d]

pmsl

:lol: :lol: :lol:

 

[wilfred]

Fantastic! I was wondering how you'd got on in the Dragons' Den ...

 

[alfyn]

Jenny,you've just made my day....absolutely brilliant :lol: :lol: :lol:

Looking forward to Juley's reply :thumbsup:

 

[affieluver]

thats brilliant :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :lol: :lol:

 

[suvi]

These should be make into a book!! (w00t)

Brilliant!

Judi

 

[maggie217]

(w00t) (w00t) (w00t) (w00t) (w00t)

 

Just fabulous :thumbsup:

 

Pauline

 

[zenobia]

hi, i nearly peed myself reading them, they didnt half make me laugh, not that im planning on running my car on it :lol: :lol: absolutely brilliant, and i agree they should be in a book you two would make a fortune. :cheers:

 

[Juley]

[SIZE=14pt]The queue was several miles long, [/SIZE]

It stretched right out of sight.

Tents and vans and motorhomes,

To sleep in overnight.

 

Giant fuel container trucks

And people with a tin.

Every kind of vessel

To put the wee wee in.

 

All the major sponsers,

Were fighting for a share.

Pediwee were winning

"Cos its our name up there".

 

A certain 5 letter charity

Were found there after all

They "happened to be passing by"

Guess someone made a call.

 

At half past eight precisely,

The crowd began to buzz.

Along came little Sparky,

Well guarded by The Fuzz.

 

A giant water tower,

Was manhandled into view.

(If Sparky doesn't drink enough,

He can't go to the loo).

 

Well, Sparky was magnificent,

He piddled all the day.

Until Crufts Show drew to an end,

And the crowds all went away.

 

The money had come rolling in,

And Sparky could retire.

He bought a large palatial house,

And stretched out by the fire.

 

He took his "mum" with him of course,

How Jenny loved the life.

So lovely, calm and peaceful,

Till Sparky took a wife.....................