Sleeping Arrangement Advice For Puppy

[Jakedno]

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Hi everyone my first post on here.

my beautiful 4 month old bulldog is settled really well and bonded with us.
she already knows tricks and is learning toilet arrangements very fast!

I’ve been trying to train her to sleep in the living room in her crate. She sleeps in there no problem when we camp out in living room with her. When we leave she cries, howls and barks.

If I allow her to sleep in the bedroom in her crate with us will this make her upset when we go to work later in life due to attachment issues? While I want to cuddle with her all day every day I want her to be okay alone also. Will she learn to sleep with us but also be okay when we leave?

ps I am not leaving her alone all day. I have day care arranged so she can socialise and a drop in dog walker!

many advice would be great thanks! I also uploaded a photo to melt your hearts

 

[JoanneF]

If I allow her to sleep in the bedroom in her crate with us will this make her upset when we go to work later in life

No, at the moment the most important thing is for her to feel secure, and being with you is what will build her confidence to be alone - that's how she will learn there actually isn't anything to be scared of. She has just been separated from her mum and littermates, and being alone is very scary for puppies especially at night. If you were to leave her to cry, it isn't teaching her that being alone is okay, it only teaches her that nobody comes to help when she is alone and afraid. In the same way as you wouldn't tell a toddler to just grow up if they were afraid of the dark, please don't leave her to cry. If she stops, it's not because she has suddenly realised everything is all right, it's because she has shut down. It's an extreme comparison but in trauma cases, the most quiet people are the most damaged ones.

To start teaching her independence, the Flitting Game is a great way to start. Once she is happy alone in a room, you can start stepping outside and slowly build up. You can find details here - https://www.thecanineconsultants.co.uk/post/flitting-game-in-full-extra-shiny

 

[JoanneF]

If I allow her to sleep in the bedroom in her crate with us will this make her upset when we go to work later in life

No, at the moment the most important thing is for her to feel secure, and being with you is what will build her confidence to be alone - that's how she will learn there actually isn't anything to be scared of. She has just been separated from her mum and littermates, and being alone is very scary for puppies especially at night. If you were to leave her to cry, it isn't teaching her that being alone is okay, it only teaches her that nobody comes to help when she is alone and afraid. In the same way as you wouldn't tell a toddler to just grow up if they were afraid of the dark, please don't leave her to cry. If she stops, it's not because she has suddenly realised everything is all right, it's because she has shut down. It's an extreme comparison but in trauma cases, the most quiet people are the most damaged ones.

To start teaching her independence, the Flitting Game is a great way to start. Once she is happy alone in a room, you can start stepping outside and slowly build up. You can find details here - https://www.thecanineconsultants.co.uk/post/flitting-game-in-full-extra-shiny

 

[Jakedno]

Thank you for your helpful reply, it’s a relief. I will allow her to sleep with us which in my heart I wanted to start with! It’s tricky knowing the correct thing to do sometimes.

 

[Flobo]

She looks super cute! What's her name?