New puppy - help

[Puppynewbie]

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Hi everyone,

I've recently bought a sprocker puppy. She's been with me for 2 weeks now and is 10 weeks old.

She's great, overall a lovely lovely dog and she's doing great with commands and training. However we have 1 problem... she whines, howls and barks whenever she's in the room on her own, especially at bedtime. We've tried everything! Weve tried leaving her alone for seconds, then building it up to minutes etc, giving her chew toys or food puzzles. She has the whole of downstairs at night time, with a pen that's left open, loads of toys, 2 beds and a blanket but instead she'll just stand at the stair gate and howl for hours all through the night. For the first few nights we had her in the bedroom on the floor but this isn't sustainable long term and ideally we'd like her to sleep downstairs or in the hallway.

Do you have any tips of what we can do? I've read a lot about leaving her to howl but when it's ongoing for hours in the middle of the night I feel so bad for doing that.

Thanks in advance

 

[Caro Perry]

She's still very young. Could you bring her back into your room for a bit so you all get some sleep? We did this with Harri for the first few nights, then put his crate outside our bedroom door so he could still hear and smell us and then gradually moved him further and further away until he was downstairs in the kitchen.

 

[JudyN]

Yeah, howling all night isn't good for them mentally (or for you come to that!), and if they do eventually quieten it tends to be conditioned helplessness rather than being happy. Stress all night will leave her still stressed the following day which won't help her develop into a confident adult.

Can I ask why you can't have her sleep in your bedroom the whole time, say in a crate? Regardless, she's still a baby so if she does sleep in with you now, you can still move her out of your room once she's more settled and generally more secure. Alternatively, one of you could make up a bed/mattress downstairs and sleep with her for a few weeks, then spend less and less of the night with her. My husband and I used to take it in turns to sleep downstairs with our pup, though he sleeps in our room now (long story).

During the day, you are probably trying to push her too fast too soon. For a few days, just let her follow you everywhere. Then she will learn that she doesn't have to keep an eye on you all the time and worry if you look like you're going to leave the room and she won't be able to get to you. Eventually, because she knows that she can follow you if you want to, she'll be less inclined to need to do this, particularly if she's got something good to chew or she's sleepy and the sunny spot is on her bed...

Dogs are like human babies. They need to develop independence gradually, and different dogs will take different amounts of time, just as some human preschoolers can be very clingy. As far as possible, let her go at her own pace... with the occasional gentle nudge

 

[Puppynewbie]

Thanks for your replies, it's really helpful.

So for the first week we didn't leave the house at all, she followed us around, got used to the house and then at the start of the second week is when we started going out for a few minutes at a time. I'm going back to work next week so that's why we've been trying to get her used to being alone for an hour or so. She isn't actually doing too bad with this and is actually pretty good. It's just bed time that's the problem.

For the first few nights we had her in our room and we slowly moved the cage away inch by inch. After a week of this we tried her downstairs and the howling begun. Maybe we moved too fast too soon?

We don't want her in our bedroom long term as we want some privacy/intimacy for the sake of our relationship - I know that sounds selfish but for the last three weeks we've barley had a relationship at all. Whilst I know the puppy needs to come first and I'm more than happy with that, long term we need time for our relationship too and I'm worried her getting used to sleeping in the bedroom will ruin any chance of that.

The last two nights I've came down and slept in the sofa with her but again this isn't sustainable long term, I can't spend all my nights on the sofa

I guess I could move her back into the bedroom again and slowly move her back but I'm also worried if I always go to her when she cries then she'll learn that's how she gets what she wants. I don't know at what point we say 'Ok, time for you to sleep downstairs now' if that makes sense.

So hard to know what's the right thing to do for everyone in the family!

 

[JudyN]

for the last three weeks we've barley had a relationship at all.

Try having children Sorry... for what it's worth, we find our dog doesn't bat an eyelid when we get 'friendly', though it's fair to say that our days of swinging from the chandaliers and keeping the neighbours awake are long gone. But having an observer can still be off-putting, even if she doesn't try to join in. It might help if she's shut in her crate, and you could drape a light blanket over it so she can't watch.

But if this doesn't sway you, I think I'd get her used to sleeping downstairs in her (closed) crate with you outside the crate. When she whines, just try to reassure her but keep it very low key. Or take her out into the garden on a lead, without saying anything, so she can toilet if she needs to. With her in the crate you can then work on being right next to the crate, then 2' away, then the other side of the room... Mind you, I've only had experience of one pup, so hopefully others can say how they managed the transition. Just bear in mind that it's still very early days, she will mature and settle, and a few weeks of inconvenience will pale into insignificance very soon after.

 

[merlina]

All I can say it's perfectly possible to have a marriage and a dog sleeping in the room! (I believe the Queen did and still had 4 children .)